Written by: Kate Dunlavey, LMSW & Mother<\/p>\n
Lately, I have been thinking a lot about the importance of play for children. The fact that play is important isn\u2019t a new realization for me. I have worked with children and families for years.\u00a0 I have read seminal articles on practice, and talked at length with parents about play \u2013 hoping to help them see the importance.\u00a0 l believed I understood why play was so vital to children, and I could teach unaware parents to support their children\u2019s play too.\u00a0 But last year, I had a significant life event: I became a mother<\/b>. Having a young child has shifted the lens through which I see most things. I experienced <\/i>in a new way what play is for a child. And I was struck by the significance of my <\/i>role in my child\u2019s play: as a witness, a meaning maker, and an emotionally available, caring presence.\u00a0 As always, life experience is my greatest teacher. Becoming a parent has expanded, solidified, and brought home my belief in the importance of parents playing with their children.<\/p>\n
Much has been written and theorized about play, its meaning and its significance. Through multi-disciplinary study, we collectively know that play is essential to a child\u2019s development, the way they make meaning in the world, the way they see themselves, and the way they figure things out. We also know that play is the way children express themselves, particularly to parents. The American Academy of Pediatrics released an article by Kenneth R. Ginsburg in 2007 stating that \u201cplay is essential to development because it contributes to the cognitive, physical, social and emotional well-being of children and youth\u201d. Further, \u201cas they master their world, play helps children develop new competencies that lead to enhanced confidence and the resiliency they will need to face future challenges\u201d.\u00a0 Ginsburg pays special attention to the role of parents and play saying, \u201cthe interactions that occur through play tell children that parents are fully paying attention to them and help build enduring relationships\u201d.<\/p>\n
Isn\u2019t this what parenting is all about?\u00a0 Creating healthy adults who will have happy lives and ultimately progress the business of making this world better?\u00a0 Many people reading this are nodding their heads in agreement and thinking yes, and that this is not new information.\u00a0 Most of us do know that playing with our children is important, and all of us want to be the best parents we can be for our children. The reality is that there can be logistical, emotional, and situational barriers to truly engaging in play with our children where we are fully present in every way. \u00a0For some parents, the barriers can be more than for others. \u00a0Many families are dealing with finances, careers, busy schedules, academics, and just simply getting dinner on the table. \u00a0Engaging in a play relationship with our children in which we are fully<\/i> present, takes emotional energy that often feels impossible. \u00a0Sometimes it feels easier and less vulnerable to watch cartoons together. \u00a0The State of Play<\/i> – a Back to Basics report from 2010, found that 21% of parents admitted \u201cthey no longer remember how to play and struggle to engage their children in creative and imaginative activities\u201d. \u00a0The barriers are real. And so is the value of playing with our children. The questions we all should be asking ourselves are these:<\/p>\n
Does my child know that his play is important to me?<\/p>\n
Does my child know that playing with him is important to me?<\/p>\n
I always want my son to know that he is important to me, and I want to meet him in his worId of play. I have realized that when I notice – really<\/i> notice- what happens between my son and me during play, I am more present, more grounded and feel content as a mother. \u00a0I have also noticed that the more we connect through play, the easier it becomes to find the time to play together every day. Here are some magnificent things I have learned about my kid just by learning to be present – noticing and engaged in his play:<\/p>\n I could go on and on and, of course I think everything he does is amazing because I\u2019m his mom.\u00a0 All partiality aside, how cool is it that I have these amazing little windows into who he is and who he might become, before he can even use words.\u00a0 He is showing me pieces of his unique personality, his preferences, things that draw him in and interest him.\u00a0 When he experiences something new and mind blowing he looks for me with a \u201cdid you see that?!\u201d expression on his face, and I get to look back and say \u201cyeah that was awesome, let\u2019s do it again!\u201d.\u00a0 Through play, we have developed a way of communicating and an understanding of one another built on trust, safety, silliness and love.\u00a0 Who knows if his feet will remain ticklish or if he will love getting pedicures one day.\u00a0 Maybe he will be an architect or maybe he will hate roller coasters.\u00a0 Whoever my son becomes, the foundation built, tested and found secure during playtime will serve him well as he develops into an adult that can weather hard times, enjoy happy times, connect with others, and make meaning in his life.\u00a0 Play has allowed my son a healthy start. \u00a0Even though he is still so small, the building blocks for a healthy adult life have begun.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Written by: Kate Dunlavey, LMSW & Mother Lately, I have been thinking a lot about the importance of play for…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":17155,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"cybocfi_hide_featured_image":"","footnotes":"","_members_access_role":[],"_members_access_error":""},"categories":[171,177,49,42,45,170,48,173,172,46,175],"tags":[67,68,115],"class_list":["post-300","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-ftip","category-hfm","category-infant-mental-health","category-passions","category-child-abuse-neglect","category-programs","category-reflective-supervision","category-svp","category-tapss","category-trauma-informed-care","category-tvp","tag-children","tag-mothers","tag-play"],"yoast_head":"\n\n